last night can last forever...

cam lagu billy joel je tajuk tu...hmmmm sbb semalam best...i met her and she's cute...live always.
In her pink top and tudung. N cakap cam biasa, best..and merajuk cam biasa...salah cakap skit kan aku dah kena pujuk....tapi tak per..sekejap je dia merajuk yang comel. Pegi dinner tempat yg best tum tapi tutup lak situ, kena pegi sebelah, yg kurang best.

Pas makan then pegi tenangkan perut kat tepi tasik, sembang2, dengar sora yang paling best dalam dunia. Meeting her is the best...thanks...for the smiles, the laughter and the joy u bring to my life....(not just last night, but the night before and the night before and the night before, last week, last month, last year....)


besi

RAya Korban

so, how was everyone...?? ok? hope so... how my comel..?? in good hand kan..comel kan...so last week cam tak ok for the first two days...but after that, it is ok...after i admit my mistake..big mistake...thanks once again to you dear...for forgiving me.

So selamat hari raya korban, it is not to late for that kot... balik kampung ari tu...sbb kena balik, aku ambik satu bahagian korban for my son, Faiz tu..Aku balik sorang je tapi. Tiket pun ambik pagi khamis tu, giler, mission impossible betul, sib baik ada, bas express, tinggal satu je Seat 2A, second behind co-driver nyer seat. Tapi ok lah selamat gak sampai ke kg aku.Ajak org tu kan..dia tak mahu plak, malu katanya. Tapi tu lah..cian dia, tak balik raya, duduk kat rumah je. Kalau tak leh beraya bersama "keluarga". Nanti lah aku upload gambar masa raya korban tu. (Lepas aku belajar camner nak buat)

Tengok lembu kena tumbang, tulung lapah lembu, best gak, tapi letih, meletihkan gak mengerat daging lembu tu..ish...peluh2 aku. Tapi tak per, sronok.

Pas setel semua tu, bawak balik daging, and bahagi2 kan kat org, and aku n family aku pegi umah nenek aku kat kg tu. Masak2 daging yang bahagian nenek aku (dia buat jugak) so ada la dua tiga org pak cik n makcik aku dan juga sepupu2 aku. Bakar daging, buat sup and masak aper ntah lagi.

Makan skit je, sbb diet kan..kang tak kurus cam comel lak.

besi
unforgiven..!!

Other side of Me

"Please forgive me..."

we walked through the forest,
enhanced by the rays
of the sun peeping through the layer of trees.
we heard the sound of life,
covering the sound of silent,
that we made.
we gaze at the leaves,
that create a smoothness to our eyes
with a green feeling of peacefullness.
the bloom of colours,
creating the sheers of beauty
the smell of the green
is the smell of life.

I don't want to miss a thing

I don't want to miss a thing

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing,
Watch you smile while you are sleeping,
While you are far away and dreaming,
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender,
I could stay lost in this moment forever,
Where a moment spent with you is a moment I treasure,

I don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep,
Cause I miss you baby, And I don't want to miss a thing,
Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do,
I still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing

(aerosmith-ost armageddon)
Lying close to you feeling your heart beating,
And I wondering what you are dreaming,
Wondering if it's me you are seeing,
Then I kiss your eyes and thank god we're together,
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever and forever forever

And I don't want to miss one smile,
I don't want to miss one kiss,
I just want to be with you right here with you,
Just like this, I just want to hold you close,
I feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment,
For all of the rest of time

black out..black out....once again...

pergh yesterday, part of our beloved nation experiencing a blackout..maybe it is cause by a blast happen at my house yesterday morning. Sorry to all, for this inconvinience.

The real thing is cause of the power surge that come from power staion and the switch gear is not working properly and on top of that the stand-by switch gear failed to cover. Damn. Major part of Malaysia were blackout cause of this...no power, no elctricity, no money...!!!


Ok, pagi tadi, masa aku kat dalam lif, ada sorang abg ni, perati kan aku je,,,aku buat tak tau je tapi aku perasan la yg dia tu tgh perati kan aku... cilakak tul, pehal lak tgk2 aku je lak mamat ni. So pas turun lif tu, dia break the ice, tanya aku " dah lama ke duduk sini?" aku cakap dalam setahun lebih, and dia kata muka aku ni macam muka kawan dia masa kat itm dulu. Pergh, ada ke org lain yang muka cma aku yang hensem ni...hmmmm ok ler tu...

and aku ada decision yang perlu dibuat...hmm tak per..comel kata..tulung jelah org..nanti time kita susah..orang akan tulung kita balik. Berserah lah pada yang Kuasa.


besi

$#!+ happen...

hmm, ever feel great, joyfull one morning when you wake up, untill something bad happen to you on that day...

i did, like today..i wake up and feel very great and good this morning. And i told myself, this is not right, thing will going bad sometime today...hmmm yeah right...it happen ...i'm in a good mood today till i know sumething. damn..and now i have no mood to tell u all...



besi

Al-Fatihah

Al-fatihah kepada roh mak angkat aku yang pergi meninggalkan tempat sementara ini pada tengah ari semalam (10/01/05). Dia pegi dengan tenang walaupun tanpa di duga, mengingatkan kita bahawa maut datang tanpa diundang, bila-bila masa dai akan tiba.

Aku mendapat berita ketika berada bersama comel, yang menemankan aku pegi tgk kereta aku yang hampr siap (yeah..!!) Then dapat je berita tu, aku ajak comel pergi menziarah jenazah di Banting. Thanks comel kerana sudi menemankan. And minta maaf kerana tak sempat nak jumpa dia semasa dia masih hidup, dah berkali-kali aku nak bawak comel jumpa dia tapi tak berkesempatan dan comel hanya dapat jumpa dia setelah dia tak ada.

Sedih, walaupun bukan sedara aku, tapi dia macam mak aku jugak. Mak Kawan aku ni si mail yang kerja ngan aku sama opis dah hampir sepuluh tahun, and belajar sama2 di Kelantan dulu. Kiranya aku kenal mail dan keluarganya hampir sepuluh tahun lebih, leibh kurang 14 tahun. Kira lama jugak ler tu kan.

Last sekali aku jumpa Mak mail ni, masa bulan posa tahun lepas, aku tgh buka posa with my adik, dekat ampang. Aku tegur dia masa tu sbb dai macam tak perasan aku, so sembang2 kejab kat luar kedai tu. And dia tanya aku macam mana aku punya marriage, aku cakap dah habis, perghh kena aku time tu.. kena marah sbb dia dah bagi amaran kat aku dulu.. "Tu la, mak cik dah kata dulu, ko degil, tgk apa dah jadi...". Siap dia suh adik aku jaga aku baik2, sbb dia ingat adik aku tu gf aku.

Hmm, tapi tak per, dah sampai masa dia, redha je. Kesian kat mail and family dia, sbb dorang smeua sayang kat mak dia walaupun mak dia garang.

Aku sampai kat rumah tu lebih kurang pukul 3, tpai jenazah belum sampai, so aku lepak with comel kat dalam keter, tunggu jenazah sampai dari Hospital. Hmm sampai dalam pukul 4, so comel masuk dalam rumah, duduk kat dalam, and layan soalan dari makcik2 yang duduk sebelah dia. And layan anak2 mail yang masih ingat dia, sbb aritu aku pegi umah mail with comel sekali.

Hmm, Al fatihah untuk roh nya..Semoga dicucuri rahmat dan berkat doa anak-anak dan kaum keluarga dan sahabat handai.

Besi
i'm sorry if i hurt you
Thanks Comel...L U

SAturday..day of joy..!!

Well on saturday, what do i do...i wake up early...subh prayer then try to sleep a little bit more after that...hmmm at nine i wake up and call my comel. Going out with her today, tgk movie and having lunch with her.

So, get up and get ready, hmmmm my perut dah buncit, antu betul...kena xcersice nie...tak muat t-shirt2 aku. Tapi tak muat la tapi cam pelik je kalau aku pakai...nampak perut...siut je...ari tu lapan bulan lepas, ok je..perut tak naik pun, cam slim je...cis...tu la makan tak ingat. Kan kena xcersice balik dah...hmm tapi tak per..untuk kesihatan gak, sihat n fit skit.

And aku baru realise yang aku tak de baju yang smart skit...ceh...nak kena beli ni...nanti tak smart kang leceh plak, ta de la nasha aziz kata aku hensem lagi...belajar jadi smart lah..tapi tak per pelan2 bak kata 'mentor' aku...nanti drastik plak kang banyak ler plak org berkenan kat aku lak..payah kang. Me only got one 'Sweet Smile' on my mind....hahahha perasan aku...(tapi tak per...elok perasan pun sbb klu tak perasan..kang terlepas lak...)

And done be a hipokrit...be who you are anywhere, in front of anyone..at anytime...Be you, who people like to be with..not you who people wanna get rid of...

so about my outing with comel..we catch a movie then have lunch, then shop for some items and then we sit down by the lake view the magnificent lake and the bluest sky (is it..i remember it is raining that day, drizzling)....hmmm sound romantic ehh...


besi

meeting with Anuar Zain (clone one lah..)

perghh...experiencing meeting with anuar zain....gila..sampaikan aku ternyanyi2 lagu anuar zain dalam toilet...tiba2 je...nyanyi lagu tu...tapi tak pasti lagu aper....hahahahahah gila penangan anuar zain nie...walaupun clone punya ....

hmmm...on friday baru nie, aku meet kawan aku ni sorang dari seberang..dia dtg jadi escort ipar dia hmmmso sementara ipar dia tu pegi berurusan...dia datang ler jumpa aku...sbb aku kan
hensem...

sembang2 ngan dia kat kedai mamak tu..then datang sorang lagi teman..(yang badan je besar tapi merajuk cam awek siut...) lepaking sekali sambil story2 ntah aper2 ntah.

lepak2 sampai magrib thne mamt ni kena balik sbb ipar dia dah panggil utk dinner ngan some big shot kat maner ntah..perghhh kawan ngan org besar2 dia nie...takut aku..

besi

where do broken heart go!!

hmm dah abih seminggu dah, mangsa2 ombak besar still kat penempatan sementara lagi. Aku heran gak, duit banyak org bagi, derma sana sini, tapi lum disalurkan ke mangsa2 ke..yang kat malaysia nie...patutnya diutamakan.

Duit berjuta dapat, tapi mangsa2 dapat rm500 sorang utk buat aper ntah, nak makan mmg la dorang diberi makan, tapi makan sardin, ikan kering je...tak buleh ke buat macam askar tu, suruh askar pegi masak kat sana, kat tmpt org tumpang duduk tu.

hmm ntah la..cam geram gak, tgk duit juta2 org bagi tapi bantuan kepada mangsa2 kat MESIA, lambat sangat. Jgn la utamakan luar negara sgt, kita pun kena jugak, walaupun sikit. Tapi still kena gak...

BAgi je bantuan, supayua dorang buleh hidup cma biasa kembali, yang nelayan turun kelaut, yang bertani kembali bercucuk tana,, yang kerja lain tu bagi kerja kembali, yang tka berumah bagi rumah cepat.


besi
waste our time with living without fear

falsafah...baca je lah..

"Jika kamu telah memiliki sepinggan nasi... yang kamu pasti baik untuk dirimu. Mengenyangkan. Berkhasiat. Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba mencari makanan yang lain.. Terlalu ingin mengejar kelazatan. Kelak, nasi itu akan basi dan kamu tidak boleh memakannya. Kamu akan menyesal. Begitu juga jika kamu telah bertemu dengan seorang insan... yang kamu pasti membawa kebaikan kepada dirimu. Menyayangimu. Mengasihimu. Mengapa kamu berlengah, cuba membandingkannya dengan yang lain. Terlalu mengejar kesempurnaan. Kelak, kamu kehilangannya dan kamu akan menyesal apabila dia beralih arah..."


besi
it is not mine but niether it is yours...!!

holiday or hollydying

monday 27/12/2004

hmmm today me with my kids..kat kl..rumah aku, hmm nak bawak jenjalan...tapi tka pasit lagi kemana...so aku plan just pegi main2 kat klcc park. Mainan kanak2 tu.
Memula tgh ari tu pegi ampang park..makan kat Mc D, sbb sibuk nak mainan2. hmm makan skit je..main je lebih..tapi tka per..budak2 kan...then sibuk nak pegi klcc, si faiz ler yang nak masuk sgt dalam klcc tu..nak pegi tgk mainan...dia dapt katalog toy R us kat Mc D tu..pergh jenuh tepis...segala macam nak dibelinyer..
harga kat tRu to tau ler cmaner...bukan calang2 mahal...jenuh aku jenuh...

tapi tka per berkat ketereran aku dalam menepis ...dapat gak aku mengelak beli mainan berharga mahal...dan pujuk dorang agar beli mainan yang murah kat kedai lain....tapi murha pun tak le sgt...rm 25 set ketapi mainan...utk faiz...sofea lak..senang je..beli hanpon satu n k.board kecik satu..dah...tak cerewet cam faiz...hmmm tak per janji dorang p uas hati...

tapi tu pun sibuk tgk katalog toy R us tu..aduhhh...tapi ayat faiz best..." nanti bila ayah kaya nanti..ayah beli lah.."...hmmmm tu la..tunggu aku kaya....ntah bila ntah..


hmmmm...
besi
silence is wisdom

it a new year..

hmmm it a new year...so what!!! am i changing to some anything super..or change to someone else...?? know i dont think so..it still me...me the one that love you....which i try to...and i will...and i do...hmmmm
maybe i cannot change me to be sum1 else or to be a super hero..or transform my self to be a car or a jet fighter or a truck..(Transformer...Superlink..!!!) hahahah the cartoon series i bought end of last year..... BUT...i can change the prepective of life and be more openly, wide open...

for me..well i don't wanna try anymore..i wanna change it...get real..!!! all this years i live in dream...dreamsssss!!

so be real...and what it is...i dun know...it come when it come..be what i wanna..and dun wanna be inside of a walls that i built my self...keeping me from the outsiders..or keeping them from me...which ever come first...hahahahaha

so...i love you..that it...

besi...

Cut the throat of your rival
On the second thought..why not burn them alive...
Maybe they will know, what you are..
Enslave their mind, to be smarter
Let you free from other..

Holiday..!!

Ahad 26/12/2004
Ok...bercuti aku selama seminggu lepas...(bencana tsunami and stuck kat tren, bak kata comel..)
hmm cuti la...maner de stuck2 kat tren...kot terbelah dua kena pintu tren tu taktau la...(cam ada orr tu imagine...semalam...)

So ...aku cuti buat aper je,...bukan ada kereta pun to go anywhere...sib baik la...ada tren....so on sunday last week..of the last month of last year...hahahaah apa aku buat ek...hmmmm...ooo..gi makan2 yang banyak...makan ayam...sbb makan kena banyak..klu tka dorang tak kasi balik...pegi ngan comel...(comel pun makan banyak gak...) Jalan2 skit then balik. Dah la masa datang tu...tren mono tu stuck tak mo berjalan...ntah naper...antu betul...sib baik ada comel...leh gak sembang2 ngan dia...

Balik naik tren gak...perghh..baru appreciate ada jalinan pengangkutan rel yang bagus...hmmm andtar comel balik sampai stesen rumah dia...then aku pun balik kl...hmm sampai kl je...aku pinjam keter housemate aku..sebab ada one thing lupa nak bagi comel...aku pegi le...balik area rumah dia...then ambik dia gi minum kat kedai...hmm leh gak tgk TV....citer superman...

hmmm pastu aku pegi ambik my kids terus kat kg...sbb aku cuti kan..so nak bawak ler budak2 ni jalan2 kl jab before Faiz start skolah....si gi ambik la budak2 with comel...lama siut aku tak jumpa..dua minggu...hmm happy siut ..jumpa dorang..sofea happy, faiz happy..aku happy...comel pun happy gak...so everyone is happy...and the lived happily ever after...( cam fairy tales)

besi
on the journey to wisdom
(and the journey to win your heart..)

Happy New Year...2005..!!

Let's Get thing going....

Happy New Year of 2005...(it seem like yesterday is Y2K panic)

Hmmm...now it is a new year..we closed last year 2004 with a disaster...terrible one...wave destroying land....and killing people....a wave....but a big one...derived from a quake near aceh..horrible..we didn't imagine this could happen here in Malaysia...where people are warm and beautifull...and where the land is much better that wverywhere else...peace and harmony...hmmm a sign from Mighty God maybe....

Imagine...peoples walking b the sea, swimming in the warm sea water with a wave (the small one and praised) and suddenly....a white line which they never saw before coing from afar...they wait by the beach to see what it is...and by the time it reached the beach...it is a disaster...people try to run away...but hey...it to late dude...the water sucking you in...

Child...baby...and little soul..who you adored when you saw them palying by the beach...vanished....pity...and then we cry...crying for help...my child is sucked into the sea...then died...hmmm

Al-fatihah to those who were gone...May their soul rest in peace..
and for those who live and survived the disaster..Thank God...remeber...god let you sea the disaster and live to tell the story...and to remember that anytime God can take you away...by any how....

and for Aceh...I know that you all have seen the news and picture of what is going on there...dead body is everywhere and it is just like the rubbish we thrown to the sea...Man, Woman, child, baby...everyone.....hmmm and no carcasses of dead animal anywhere..(do they run away before it happen..???, or they knew it going to happen...animal...who we always said they are dumb, no brain..hence the phrase.."Bodoh cam Lembu"...

Al-Fatihah to those who gone...let us pray this would never happen again...



besi
a new year is a new day...
but we all is still the same way...